Thursday, October 8, 2009

My husband was reacently diagnosed with Aspergers. It explains so much, but I don't think I can

I had planned on leaving him well before this happened. We never see eye-to-eye on things. He has a hair trigger temper. He's always in his own world. He is so negative. The world is out to get him. Now with the Aspie diagnosis, so much of this is explained. And at first I was relieved. But now, I realize that it's still alot to deal with whether it's his fault or not. I want to go ahead with my plans to leave.



We have 2 kids, our son is also on the spectrum. I live in constant fear that my husband will lose his temper in front of the kids. The kids absolutely adore their dad, but they're very young still. The older they get, the less I will be able to shield them from his outbursts.



I live in complete misery whenever he's home. I've started taking naps when he's home just to avoid him. He seems to do much better when I'm not around either. He says he's so in love with me, but I can't reciprocate. Not only do I not love him, I think I hate him. Sometimes I daydream about him dying.



My husband was reacently diagnosed with Aspergers. It explains so much, but I don't think I can stay with him.

you need to do what's right for you. but if he has Asperger's, he's been like this all along, correct? Why stay so long and have two kids?



My husband was reacently diagnosed with Aspergers. It explains so much, but I don't think I can stay with him.

Oh ..just get out of the situation before it gets worse, Divorce is better than Hate and Death Wishes!



My husband was reacently diagnosed with Aspergers. It explains so much, but I don't think I can stay with him.

Ican understand you situation,but if you leave him now, you may feel guilty later.Misery is everywhere in the world.Try adjusting here for you have your kids.Avoid his temper and arguements.



My husband was reacently diagnosed with Aspergers. It explains so much, but I don't think I can stay with him.

When you say that your husband has been diagnosed with Aspergers, does that mean that he was diagnosed by a professional? Sounds to me like your husband has a mental illness and needs professional help. Moreover, if you feel that your life is in danger you should find a place where you can be safe temporarily. Maybe you can visit a family member or friend until your husband is treated for his illness.



My husband was reacently diagnosed with Aspergers. It explains so much, but I don't think I can stay with him.

Before you do anything drastic,



Start seeing a counseler, either at your church or at a center.



Go alone at first, because you will have to deal with your own feelings before being able to deal with his.



This is important for your children as well as yourself.



There are medications that your husband will be put on and while homelife will get better, your own residual resentment must be dealt with.



No one is perfect and children deserve the benefit of two parents if at all possible. In this case it is possible, but only with medication and hard work.



My husband was reacently diagnosed with Aspergers. It explains so much, but I don't think I can stay with him.

You have to do what is right for you and your children. If you were considering leaving him even before the diagnosis, then you should go ahead with your plans, the diagnosis should make no difference in your decision. Was he this way when you two originally got married, and if so, why did you marry him to begin with?



The safety of your children is paramount! If he is being aggressive towards you, it will eventually roll over onto your children. I'll pray for you to have the strength to do the right thing. Good luck!



My husband was reacently diagnosed with Aspergers. It explains so much, but I don't think I can stay with him.

Were you not paying attention at your wedding when the preacher asked "...in sickness and in health?" Your husband has a illness and you leaving him will only make things worse for him. Do you want your kids to grow up and hate you for what you did to him?



It sounds like you need some alone time to get your act together. Have you thought of temporarily moving out for a month?



Now that he knows what the problem is, it is now possible to deal with it. He now knows that the problems may be because he doesn't think like a neurotypical. You both need to seek counseling with someone who is experienced in dealing with adult aspies.

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